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ing but a huge bladder of wind. He talks of vanquishing all opposition by the force of reason and philosophy ; throws his gauntlet at all the nations of the earth, and defies them to meet him-on the field of argument!-is the national dignity insulted, a case in which his highness of Tripoli would immediately call forth his forces ;— the bashaw of America-utters a speech. Does a foreign invader molest the commerce in the very mouth of the harbors; an insult which wonld induce his highness of Tripoli to order out his fleets ;-his highness of America-utters a speech. Are the free citizens of America dragged from on board the vessels of their country, and forcibly detained in the war ships of another power his highnessutters a speech. Is a peaceable citizen killed by the marauders of a foreign power, on the very shores of his country- his highness utters a speech. Does an alarming insurrection break out in a distant part of the empire- his highness utter3 a speech !-nay, more, for here he shows bis““ energies ;":---he most intrepidly despatches a courier on horseback, and orders him to ride one hundred and twenty miles a day, with a most formidable army of proclamations, i. e. a collection of words, packed up in his saddle bags. He is instructed to show no favor nor affection ; but to charge the thickest ranks of the enemy; and to speechify and batter by words the conspiracy and the conspirators ont of existence. Heavens, my friend, what a deal of blustering is here! it re- . minds me of a dunghill cock in a farm-yard, who, having accidentally in his scratchings found a worin, immediately begins a most vociferous cackling; -calls around him his hen-hearted companione, who run chattering from all quarters to gobble up the poor little worm that happened to turn under his eye. Oh, Asem, Asem ! on what a prodigious great scale is every thing in this country!
Thus, then, I conclude my observations. The infidel nations have each a separate characteristic trait, by which they may be distinguished from each other :-the spaniards, for instance, may be said to sleep upon every affair of importance;-the italians to fiddle upon every thing ;--the french to dance upon every thing ;---the germans to smoke upon every thing—the british islanders to eat upon every thing ;-and the windy subjects of the american logocracy to talk upon every thing.
FROM THE MILL OF
PINDAR COCKLOFT, ESQ,
How oft in musing mood my heart recalls, From grey-beard father Time's oblivious halls, The modes and maxims of my early day, Long in those dark recesses stow'd away: Drags once more to the cheerful realms of light Those buckram fashions, long since lost in night, And makes, like Endor's witch, once more to rise My grogram grandames to my raptured eyes!
Shades of my fathers ! in your pasteboard skirts, Your broidered waistcoats and your plaited shirts, Your formal bag-wigs—wide-extended cuffs, Your five inch chitterlings and nine inch ruffs! Gods! how ye strut, at times, in all your state, Amid the visions of my thoughtful pate! I see ye move the solemn minuet o'er, The modest foot scarce rising from the floor; No thundering rigadoon with boisterous prance, No pigeon-wing disturb your contre-danse.
But silent as the gentle Lethe's tide,
Still in my mental eye each dame appears.
Ah! golden days! when every gentle fair
No plays were then-theatrics were unknown-