Ellen M'Jones Aberdeen Reason returns, religious right redounds, Vanish vain victory! vanish victory vain! Yield, ye youths! ye yeomen, yield your yell! And all attracting-arms against appeal. ELLEN M'JONES ABERDEEN MACPHAIRSON CLONGLOCKETTY ANGUS M'CLAN 2005 Unknown You've guessed him a Scotchman, shrewd reader, at sight, From the bonnie blue Forth to the lovely Deeside, Who could pipe with Clonglocketty Angus M'Clan. No other could wake such detestable groans, With reed and with chanter-with bag and with drones: He'd clamber a mountain and squat on the ground, All loved their M'Clan, save a Sassenach brute, Torbay had incurred a good deal of expense A Sassenach chief may be bonily built, He may purchase a sporran, a bonnet, and kilt; Clonglocketty's pipings all night and all day "Macphairson Clonglocketty Angus, my lad, Boiled over the blood of Macphairson M’Clan- "Let's show," said M'Clan, "to this Sassenach loon He blew at his "Cottage," and blew with a will, It was wild-it was fitful-as wild as the breeze- It was jerky, spasmodic, and harsh, I'm aware, The Sassenach screamed and the Sassenach danced, "Hech gather, hech gather, hech gather around: And fill a' yer lugs wi' the exquisite sound. To the Terrestrial Globe An air frae the bagpipes-beat that if ye can! The fame of his piping spread over the land; One morning the fidgety Sassenach swore Oh! loud were the wailings for Angus M'Clan, It sorrowed poor Pattison Corby Torbay And solaced their souls with the following words: "Oh, maidens," said Pattison, touching his hat, "Don't blubber, my dears, for a fellow like that; Observe, I'm a very superior man, A much better fellow than Angus M'Clan." 2007 They smiled when he winked and addressed them as "dears," Especially Ellen M'Jones Aberdeen. William Schwenck Gilbert [1836-1911] TO THE TERRESTRIAL GLOBE BY A MISERABLE WRETCH ROLL on, thou ball, roll on! What though I'm in a sorry case? What though I cannot meet my bills? Roll on, thou ball, roll on! Roll on! It's true I've got no shirts to wear; Never you mind! Roll on. (It rolls on) William Schwenck Gilbert [1836–1911] HIS HEART WAS TRUE TO POLL I'LL sing you a song, not very long, But the story somewhat new, Of William Kidd, who, whatever he did, To his Poll was always true. He sailed away in a gallant ship From the port of old Bristol, And the last words he uttered, As his handkercher he fluttered, Were, "My heart is true to Poll." His heart was true to Poll, "Twas a wreck. William, on shore he swam, And looked about for an inn; When a noble savage lady, of a color rather shady, Came up with a kind of grin: Red Riding Hood "Oh, marry me, and a king you'll be, And in a palace loll; Or we'll eat you willy-nilly." So he gave his hand, did Billy, But his heart was true to Poll. Away a twelvemonth sped, and a happy life he led As the King of the Kikeryboos; 2009 His paint was red and yellow, and he used a big umbrella, And he wore a pair of over-shoes; He'd corals and knives, and twenty-six wives, Whose beauties I cannot here extol: One day they all revolted, So he back to Bristol bolted, For his heart was true to Poll. Francis Cowley Burnand [1837 RED RIDING HOOD MOST worthy of praise were the virtuous ways And no one was ever more cautious and clever They never misled, for they meant what they said, They were careful to show her the way she should go, For obedience she was effusively thanked, And for anything else she was carefully spanked. It thus isn't strange that Red Riding Hood's range of virtues so steadily grew, That soon she won prizes of various sizes, And golden encomiums too. As a general rule she was head of her school, And at six was so notably smart That they gave her a check for reciting The Wreck And you all will applaud her the more, I am sure, |