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the bystanders, who knew of the mur- sidered by an English lady to be for der, had him apprehended, when he ever stained and polluted by the introconfessed the fact, and was shortly duction of a filthy cegar!-yet Spanish after hanged upon the spot.
lips and English lips are exquisitely
sweet-! GEOLOGICAL DISCOVERY. The tight laced appearance of a
A remarkable circumstance took London belle would but ill suit the place in excavating the ground for the loose undress of a Brazilian lady,--but East India Docks at Blackwall, in the custom, custom is the law of nations, year 1790. A regular strata of sand and although her zone may be wanting and clay were found, and twelve or to a South American Venus, her chasfourteen feet underneath, numbers of tity is not to be the less believed. large trees were discovered ; and what The Count de BP when is most remarkable, a hazel nut hedge, minister at Rio Janeiro, was highly with considerable quantities of nuts, as
offended at his valet-to dismiss was they grew on the trees!
not sufficient, and he seriously de
manded of the Portuguese authorities, CRANIOLOGY DEFEATED.
whether, as minister of Russia, and
representative of the Emperor Alex“We have Thurtell's body at Bar- ander, he was not permitted to chastise tholomew's,” said a student in a letter his offending servants according to to a friend, “ and making allowance the custom of his country-on being as for the distortion of his features from gravely informed, that to be in Rome, the manner of his death, I may say he his Excellency must do as Rome did, was an ill-looking fellow. I was near
the culprit valet fortunately escaped a the celebrated Lawrence when he felt heavy punishment of the knout! for the organ of murder; but, alas! for
The characteristics of nations are Craniology, its place was usurped by amusing to an observing eye, but if a the lumps of benevolence and venera
man throws himself into a carriage tion."
and gets whirled through the continent
(out of humour with himself and the NATIONALITIES.
people), he will be soon and easily dis
gusted.-An infirm testy old gentleman I have heard it often affirmed that travelling through Switzerland, was the belief in nationalities is nothing met by a friend of mine actually tied but prejudice, and that the more a man
and secured on the dicky, taking a travels, the more will he be convinced hasty view of the romantic scenery as on that subject. It is a good doctrine to check illiberal stop a moment more than requisite in
the carriage proceeded; he would not prejudices with regard to foreigners; a republican country, and when this but, that nations have their strong cha- rigid aristocrat was asked how he racteristics, or nationalities, is a fact liked Switzerland, “It would be a dewhich cannot be doubted. It is not to be supposed that all had a king.”
lightful country (he replied) if they Frenchmen can dance quadrilles ; that every Italian can sing in tune; or every German greedily devour saur kraut; DIARY OF A LADY OF QUALITY, nor is it a fact that every Englishman
IN THE REIGN OF QUEEN ANNE. worships plum-pudding, or venerates huge masses of roast beef; yet these Waked out of the most charming are the distinguishing points, by which dream, produced, no doubt, by my these different nations are frequently winnings at ombre last night, by news characterised, and may doubtless as- of the arrival of the old woman, who sume the name of nationalities.
carries on a contraband trade in the The lively smirk and quick saluta- Exchange, under pretence of selling tion of an Italian, or a Frenchman, millinery. In a very tolerable humour make a strong contrast to the formal I receive her, owing to these side face, and straight extended hand of an winnings; though vexed at being disEnglishmanor a German.--The stomach turbed from such a slumber. I thought that revolts at a frog fricaseed will de. I was sailing down the Thames, like vour a roasted ox; and the delicate Cleopatra on the Cydnus, in Dryden's lips of a Spanish damsel would be con- divine play, and that all the trees were
lighted up with coloured lamps to do and dressed : wrote half a dozen notes me honour; and the swans at Sion while drinking my chocolate ; one to House bad golden collars round their P- signed | Incognita, appointing a necks, and P- stood on the shore in meeting at Spring Garden-If he should a blue watered tabby coat trimmed prove faithless and come, what shall I with silver, like Marc Antony, to re- do? How shall I be revenged ? In ceive me. Gorgeous and magnificent case of such an accident, I addressed as my dream was, I verily think that a note to his rival, my Lord WorthlessMrs. Cheatem's smuggled cargo sur. a piece of penmanship which I pride passed it. Oh! how I longed to buy myself not a little upon ; for it is just her whole stock; there were flowered calculated to inspire the highest desilks, with roses, daffodils, and China gree of hope, without giving any enasters worked upon them as large as couragement,which I can but withdraw life, and rendered more beautiful than when it suits me so to do; and as my life by being edged with gold and Lord is rather notorious for shewing silver; a Genoa cut velvet, with trees his billet, I did not sign my name, and and birds like nature itself; rich point took care to write every word by the ruffles; and a delicate Brussels apron, dictionary, that I might not be disthat was as fine as a cobweb; then covered by my bad spelling. Have there were India muslins, which seem some thought of hiring a secretary: it ed to contain the mines of Coromandel; is a horrid troublesome task for a fans a yard long; with the sweetest woman of quality to be obliged to French mounts,-one such a delightful study like a clerk or a governess: and moral scene, a whole village, all the I heard that impudent guardsman, cottages had glass windows, very con- Colonel Graceless, laugh at my Lady venient, for one can peep through them Duchess's pot-hook and danger, as he instead of the sticks which deceive called them, on a card, whereon she nobody, the shepherdesses dressed in had spelt coffee,with a K. Received sacques, and petticoats of the newest three or four letters; one which I Paris cut, nothing at all like them in knew by the perfume, before I opened London, and the shepherds so languish- it, to be from P- A boat to-morrow ing and graceful; one the very image to Richmond : collation ordered at the of P- in a blue court suit, and a sword Star and Garter. My dream is out; by his side, just such an elegant fellow; to be sure I gave him a strong hint who handled his crook as gallantly as yesterday of my wishes. O what a if it had been my Lord Chamberlain's dear delightful man it is! A copy of wand of office. Oh, the ingenuity and verses, subscribed Enamorata, beginthe taste of these French people! Mrs. ningCheat'em asked a fortune for the fan; By those brigh: charms and by that heavenly but I was determined to secure it at
By all the flames that 'neath your eye-lids any price; I could only afford to buy
glow, a case of essences, a pot or two of One smile can raise me from extreme despair; rouge, a wash for the skin, and a cake One frown can cast me to the shades below. of amber soap; for I just recollected This comes from the young Templar in time that I had promised to go to I am certain, who, for want of somethe London warehouse in the city, and thing better to do, I coquetted with, if I delayed a day, that odious lady B- the day I went to the Temple gardens would not leave a bit of china, or a to see the city companies embark for gold fish that was worth having: by some vulgar festival. I wonder whether the way, Frippery, my maid, fished the lines are his own, or borrowed from out of Mrs. Cheat'em, that B- pads Cowley or Waller. I must punish his her shoulder, and her hip; I always boldness in sending them; for I shall suspected that hip; and that the never be able to screen it at court, if it devout Mrs. Cantwell, who goes to is known that a Templar presumes to church three times a day, and rails my favour. A new poem with Lord at the play-houses, is her best customer Bookworm's profound respects : deuce for Coniac; and that Barbara Love- take his civility; now shall I be obliged lace, the new beauty, spends all her to pour out my eyes over printed paper; money upon charms and fortune-tell- for it is quite the ton to read this young ing. Who does she want to captivate? author's works; a little crooked fellow I must find out. This information has I am told, which makes it the more determined me not to trust any of my strange: he must never expect to be secrets to Mrs. Cheat'em. Breakfasted patronized by the ladies, thoagh the
wits support him. For my part, I hate for half a yard of tiffany; this horrid all reading except love-letters, and woman had the impudence to try now and then a paper or two of the to outbid me at the auction, for å Spectator, when there is any thing of monkey and a Chinese joss; and in fashion or scandal in them; and ab- the heat of my anger I gave three solutely detest poetry, unless it be MS. times as much for the filthy things as addressed to myself, or that which is they are worth, and let Lady B. run recited on the stage. If P-wishes away with a cut cornelian necklace, to win me, he must woo me in the and a cage full of the prettiest avadestrains of Dryden; but I ought to be vets that ever was seen. Went to the thinking of my Lord Bookworm's pre- Mall in order to disperse my chagrin; sent; Frippery shall read it to me it was crowded to a most delightful whilst the man dresses my hair. Oh excess, and nobody so well attended Lord, I know as much about it as ever; as myself. P- not being there, I for Mr. Papillotte was so full of news, could not resist accepting the devoirs and my head was so bewildered with of Lord Worthless, Colonel Graceless, the brocaded petticoat which the man- and half a dozen of their rakish comtua-maker had just sent home, and my panions, especially as I saw that Bardream, and Torrismond's speech to the bara had cast her eye upon Sir Charles Queen of Grenada, and my new fan, Brilliant, one of the number; and to and the fly-cap I have been a whole take a lover from another woman is week trying to invent, that I did not the next delightful thing to receiving listen to a word of it; and if I take it the addresses of the man of our choice: with me in the carriage when I go to she tore a finger from her glove, and the city, I shall be sure to fall asleep broke a fan in anger. Whilst I toped over it, and tumble my head-dress, and my plumes on high, and rallied with so come out of the coach just such a the most careless air imaginable. Pfigure as old Lady Routabout, when had no business to be absent; and so she has been obliged to sit out a ser. I asked the whole set to join our party mon at Whitehall.-Not a guinea left! to Richmond to-morrow, the thing of I protest these city excursions will all others which I knew would vex absolutely make me a beggar; and him: well, he should have been in the now I find I have not an use for an Park and prevented it. Went home earthly thing I have bought: and the to dinner, and then sat to receive comsilk that I haggled with the shopman pany. P- came as charming as usual, for an hour and a half before he would in an elegant undress, which is all the abate a sixpence in the yard, and was rage in France now I am told: he obliged to purchase at last by letting brought the fashions and Paris chitthe fellow make me a speech, which chat in a letter from the ambassador; he must have conned out of the cabinet and a new game of hazard, which he of compliments, does not suit my com- prophecies will take the pass of ombre plexion in the least, and it is not at all and basset: it must be very fascinating genteel into the bargain, positively if it does; for methinks I could beggar only fit for an alderman's wife to wear my whole generation at either, and at my Lady Mayoress's ball; and I am love the ruin still. In the midst of grown out of all humour and conceit this delightful conversation, he sudwith my last new cardinal, though I denly recollected an engagement, and verily believe it has “ six thousand left me. I wonder whether Springyards of edging round it,” as Lady garden was in his head. I was just Betty_Modish says in the play; for going to equip myself for the advenMrs. Deputy Mazarine, the mercer's ture, when the Countess of Gadily, fat spouse,' sailed through the shop and her set, rushed in, and insisted while I was tumbling over her hus- upon carrying me off to the playband's goods with the exact counter- house, to see a new tragedy; there part on, her hideous red arms fading was no escaping, so I was obliged to the colour, and trapesing into the dusty send Frippery instead; a dangerous street with that trimming, which was expedient, for she is a decent looking altogether too extravagant and out of figure, and with the help of my cast off the way, just to show the court lady clothes, might pass very well in a that she could dress as fine, and value mask. We all agreed ; that is, our her clothes as little as the best of us. party, that the Muse of Tragedy died I'll be revenged; for I'll give mine with Dryden: there were some horrid to Frippery, and send her to the shop people in the pit and gallery, who had
the assurance to be of a different opi- great a sacrifice. Tumbled and tossed nion, and cried out silence, and obliged all night-full of rage and despair us to attend whether we would or not. quarrelled with all my tradespeople I think that playhouses should be what a time to send in their bills: built with nothing but boxes: I, who look frightful-nothing becomes me: make it a rule never to do anything surely I have not grown old and ugly that I am desired, was determined not in one night-Returned from Richto listen to a word of the play, though mond, coquetted the whole way with there were some very moving things Lord Worthless, would not so much as in it, so I reconnoitered the house, speak, or look at P-; found fault casting glances into the pit to see if with the whole entertainment, though, my charms would not mollify the to say the truth, nothing could have brutes. The Templar was then one of been more elegant; called the music the ring-leaders, but when his eye discord, and would not permit it to caught mine he disappeared. Soon play; then complained of dullness; after, I saw him enter the boxes full told Lord Worthless that things would dressed, aping the air of a courtier, have been different if he had had the and looking like country John in his management, and that few people knew new livery. I took no notice of him how to give a treat; my lord was abo. I sought for higher game-Sir Charles minably tipsy, and ill behaved; came Brilliant was the man. Alas! poor home displeased with myself, and all Barbara, I believe I have undone all the world, for P- looked uncommonly those spells which Mrs. Cheat'em handsome, and endured all my impermade such a profit of. The Templar, tinence with the most gentlemanly forwhich is his vulgar name, nettled at bearance. Oh, heaven! what shall I my neglect, assumed a domineering do? What have I done? I shall go disair, and joined his low allies in the tracted !-Frippery has confessed such pit in enforcing silence. Sir Charles a plot; she calumniated P-. Barbara resisted this; and, as Mincing says, Lovelace, and Lady B- at the bottom “ I verily thought they must have fit." of it; only because I told the story of I sat serene amid the storm; but at the same hip, and drew Sir Charles last the confusion became so intoler- away from his true love. Frippery able, and the gallery people so abu- found a light guinea among the gold sive, that we were fain to retreat to lace which Lady B- had bribed her our chairs. Intending to call in just with, shabby creature; and Barbara's for a minute at Mrs. Manille's, I had yellow tabinet so faded and full of such a charming run of luck, that I holes, that it would neither turn or could not leave the dear table until dye; so in a fit of remorse she betrayed four o'clock in the morning. I suspect the whole; I believe I beat her; I that Sir Charles lost on purpose, for would have turned the jade out of he became very free in his speech as if doors, but she is unfit, and knows all he had purchased the right. My ser my secrets; so I made it up by giving vice to you, Sir Charles, I am more her my pink negligée, and I shall take secure of your money than you are of care never to believe another word she my favour. Mrs. Carmine certainly says, I am determined to brave the cheats, I saw her slip a card: really matter out, and bring P.- upon his the men drank so much wine, and grew knees before I'll confess myself to so careless, that it was a temptation blame, though, to have made sport for one could hardly resist. I did not my enemies, almost kills me with vexaknow whether I did or not. Came tion; they shall not see it. home in a very good humour, but dressed for the ball with even more almost stunned by Frippery's news. than usual care! Lord! here's that P- did meet her in Spring-garden, scandalous fellow Gossip, full of news. professed the warmest love. Oh the Sir Charles and the Templar, have perfidious, the base, the deceitful fought. Well, what do I care; there devil! perjured, perjured man! I begin would be a fop and a pedant less in to hate Frippery; she could not get the world if both were killed. I don't away she says, without promising know that I had much to do in the another interview. To be taken by business, except just egging on Sir such a awkin, owing every attrac- Charles to say the most cutting things. tion to my cast clothes. I'll be re- Worse, and worse, another horrid duel, venged, whatever it may cost-friends, P- and Lord Worthless; P. dangerfortune, reputation-nothing is too ously wounded, I fainted away at the
intelligence; grew delirious; nothing supposition, have been much greator shall prevent me from going to him, against him than against me; for I confessing all my follies, and receiving have only lost my eyes, but he lost his last forgiveness :-he will die, I his head.' The Duke was exceedingly am sure he will die. I wish there was nettled at this answer, and went away a convent in England, and that I had soon after very angry. When he came taken the veil. Frippery tells me that back to the court, the first thing he she thinks I have been too hasty in said to the King, was, “ Brother, you confessing my faults: none so very are greatly to blame that you don't heinous, upon consideration, particu. have that old rogue Milton hanged."larly as it was only a flesh wound Why, what's the matter, Jamest said after all. But then my reputation the King, you seem in a heat! what, might have suffered if I had not been have you seen Milton!'_“ Yes," anreconciled to P-, for I would not swered the Duke, “ I have seen him." marry my Lord for the whole universe: “Well,' said the King, “In what conand P. looked so divine in his robe de dition did you find him?'-“ Condichambre, and his arm bound with a tion!” replied the Duke," why he's scarf. He made hard terms with me, old, and very poor."- Old and poor! though: would not trust me in town said the King; ' well, and he is blind, during his necessary absence; and the is he not?—": Yes,” said the Duke, only proof I could give of my sincerity, “ blind as a beetle.”Why then you as he was very hard of belief, as well are a fool, James,' replied the King, he might, was to banish myself at my 'to want to have him hanged as a cousin's in the 'country; and must í punishment: to hang him will be doing go? Oh, odious, odious trees!
him a service; it will be taking him Journal des Modes. out of his miseries. No, if he is old,
poor, and blind, he is miserable enough DAINTY MORSELS;
in all conscience: let him live.' OR, APTER DINNER CHIT CHAT,
: A NOVEL WEDDING,
Dean Swift one day walking, as was
his custom, from London towards Old Play.
Chester, is said to have taken shelter
from a summer tempest under a large ANECDOTE OF JAMES DUKE spreading tree by the road side, not
OF YORK, SECOND SON OF far from Lichfield. Presently a man, CHARLES I.
together with a woman who seemed to The Duke of York, it is said, one
be pregnant, availed themselves of the day told the King his brother, that he
same covert. Entering into conversahad heard so much of old Milton, he that they were on the way for Litch
tion with them, Dean Swift learned had a great desire to see him. Charles field to be married. As the situation told the Duke, that he had no objection of the lady indicated that no time to his satisfying his curiosity; and accordingly shortly after, James, hav. ought to be lost, the dean proposed to ing informed himself where Milton
save them the rest of the journey, by lived, went privately to his house, uniting them on the spot. The offer Being introduced to him, and Milton
was gladly accepted, and after having being informed of the rank of his guest, they were about to depart, ås the sky
expressed their thanks to Dean Swift, they conversed together for some time; brightened; but the bridegroom sudbut, in the course of their conversation, denly recollecting himself, that a certhe Duke asked Milton, “ Whether he tificate would be necessary to authentidid not think the loss of his sight was a judgment upon him for what he had cate their marriage, he begged the dean written against the late King his would give him one. The dean taking father?” Milton's reply was to this out his pencil, wrote it in the following
terms: effect: If your Highness thinks that the calamities which befall us here, Under an oak, in stormy weather, are indications of the wrath of Heaven, I joined this rogue and whore together : in what manner are we to account for
And none bat lie wlio rules the thunder the fate of the King your father? The
Can part this royne and whore asander. displeasure of Heaven must, upon this