(For long agone I have forgot to court: Val. Win her with gifts, if she respect not words; Val. Why then I would resort to her by night. Duke. Ay, but the doors be lock'd, and keys kept safe, That no man hath recourse to her by night. Val. What lets, but one may enter at her window? Duke. Her chamber is aloft, far from the ground; And built so shelving, that one cannot climb it Without apparent hazard of his life. Val. Why then, a ladder, quaintly made of cords, To cast up with a pair of anchoring hooks, Would serve to scale another Hero's tower, So bold Leander would adventure it. Duke. Now, as thou art a gentleman of blood, Advise me where I may have such a ladder. Val. When would you use it? pray, sir, tell me that. Duke. This very night; for love is like a child, That longs for every thing that he can come by. Val. By seven o'clock I'll get you such a ladder. Duke. But, hark thee; I will go to her alone; How shall I best convey the ladder thither? Val. It will be light, my lord, that you may bear it Under a cloak, that is of any length. Duke. A cloak as long as thine will serve the turn. Val. Ay, my good lord. Duke. Then let me see thy cloak: I'll get me one of such another length. But if thou linger in my territories, Pro. Run, boy, run, run, and seek him out. Pro. What seest thou? Val. No Valentine, indeed, for sacred Silvia !— ?-Hath she forsworn me? Pro. No, Valentine. [Reads. Val. Why, any cloak will serve the turn, my lord. Duke. How shall I fashion me to wear a cloak I pray thee, let me feel thy cloak upon me.-What letter is this same? What's here?-To Silvia ? And here an engine fit for my proceeding! I'll be so bold to break the seal for once. My thoughts do harbour with my Silvia nightly; And slaves they are to me, that send them flying: O, could their master come and go as lightly, Himself would lodge, where senseless they are lying. My herald thoughts in thy pure bosom rest them; While I, their king, that thither them importune, Do curse the grace that with such grace hath bless'd them, Because myself do want my servant's fortune: I curse myself, for they are sent by me, That they should harbour where their lord should be. What's here? Silvia, this night I will enfranchise thee: 'Tis so; and here's the ladder for the purpose.- Thank me for this, more than for all the favours, Val. No Valentine, if Silvia have forsworn me!What is your news? [vanish'd. Laun. Sir, there's a proclamation that you are Pro. That thou art banished, O, that's the news; From hence, from silvia, and from me thy friend. Val. O, I have fed upon this woe already, And now excess of it will make me surfeit. Doth Silvia know that I am banished? Pro. Ay, ay; and she hath offer'd to the doom, (Which, unrevers'd, stands in effectual force,) A sea of melting pearl, which some call tears: Those at her father's churlish feet she tender'd; With them, upon her knees, her humble self; Wringing her hands, whose whiteness so became As if but now they waxed pale for woe: [them, But neither bended knees, pure hands held up, Sad sighs, deep groans, nor silver-shedding tears, Could penetrate her uncompassionate sire; But Valentine, if he be ta'en, must die. Besides, her intercession chaf'd him so, When she for thy repeal was suppliant, That to close prison he commanded her, With many bitter threats of 'biding there. [speak'st, Val. No more; unless the next word that thou Have some malignant power upon my life: If so, I pray thee, breathe it in mine ear, As ending anthem of my endless dolour. Pro. Cease to lament for that thou can'st not Val. I pray thee, Launce, an if thou seest my boy, Laun. Well, that fault may be mended with a breakfast: Read on. Speed. Item, She hath a sweet mouth. Laun. That makes amends for her sour breath. Laun. It's no matter for that, so she sleep not in her talk. Speed. Item, She is slow in words. Laun. O villain, that set this down among her vices! To be slow in words, is a woman's only virtue: I pray thee, out with't; and place it for her chief virtue. Speed. Item, She is proud. Laun. Out with that too; it was Eve's legacy, and cannot be ta'en from her. Speed. Item, She hath no teeth. Laun. I care not for that neither, because I love crusts. Speed. Item, She is curst. Laun. Well; the best is, she hath no teeth to bite. [Exeunt Valentine and Proteus. Laun. I am but a fool, look you; and yet I have the wit to think, my master is a kind of knave: but that's all one, if he be but one knave. He lives not now, that knows me to be in love: yet I am in love; but a team of horse shall not pluck that from me; nor he who 'tis I love, and yet 'tis a woman: but that woman, I will not tell myself; and yet 'tis a milk-maid; yet 'tis not a maid, for she hath had gossips: yet 'tis a maid, for she is her master's maid, and serves for wages. She hath more qualities than a water-spaniel,-which is much in a barechristian. Here is the cat-log [Pulling out a paper.] of her conditions. Imprimis, She can fetch and carry. Why, a horse can do no more; nay, a horse cannot fetch, but only carry; therefore is she bet-it: The cover of the salt hides the salt, and thereter than a jade. Item, She can milk; look you, a sweet virtue in a maid with clean hands. Laun. If her liquor be good, she shall: if she will not, I will; for good things should be praised. Speed. Item, She is too liberal. Laun. Of her tongue she cannot; for that's writ down she is slow of of her purse she shall not; for that I'll keep shut: now of another thing she may; and that I cannot help. Well, proceed. Enter Speed. Speed. How now, signior Launce? what news with your mastership? Laun. With my master's ship? why it is at sea. Speed. Well, your old vice still; mistake the word: What news then in your paper? Laun. The blackest news that ever thou heard'st. Laun. Why as black as ink. Laun. Fye on thee, jolt-head; thou canst not read. Laun. I will try thee: Tell me this: Who begot thee? Speed. Marry, the son of my grandfather. Laun. Ay, that she can. Speed. Item, She brews good ale. Speed. Item, She hath more hair than wit, and more faults than hairs: and more wealth thun faults. Laun. Stop there; I'll have her: she was mine, and not mine, twice or thrice in that last article: Rehearse that once more. Speed. Item, She hath more hair than wit,- fore it is more than the salt; the hair that covers the wit, is more than the wit; for the greater hides the less. What's next? Speed. And more faults than hairs, Laun. That's monstrous: O, that that were out! Laun. Why, that word makes the faults gracious: Well, I'll have her: And if it be a match, as nothing is impossible, Speed. What then? Laun. Why, then will I tell thee,-that thy master stays for thee at the north gate. Speed. For me? Laun. For thee? ay: who art thou? he hath staid for a better man than thee. Speed. And must I go to him? Laun. Thou must run to him, for thou hast staid so long, that going will scarce serve the turn. Speed. Why didst not tell me sooner? 'pox of your love letters! [Exit. Laun. Now will he be swinged for reading my letter: An unmannerly slave, that will thrust him. self into secrets-I'll after, to rejoice in the boy's correction. [Exit. Laun. And therefore comes the proverb,-Bless-SCENE II.-The same. A Room in the Duke's ing of your heart, you brew good ale. Speed. Item, She can sew. Laun. That's as much as to say, can she so? Speed. Item, She can knit. Palace. Enter Duke and Thurio; Proteus behind. Duke. Sir Thurio, fear not, but that she will love [you, Laun. What need a man care for a stock with a Now Valentine is banish'd from her sight. wench, when she can knit him a stock. Speed. Item, She can wash and scour. Thu. Since his exile she hath despis'd me most, Forsworn my company, and rail'd at me, Laun. A special virtue; for then she need not That I am desperate of obtaining her. be washed and scoured. Speed. Item. She can spin. Laun. Then may I set the world on wheels, when she can spin for her living. Speed. Item, She hath many nameless virtues. Laun. That's as much as to say, bastard virtues; that, indeed, know not their fathers, and therefore have no names. Speed. Here follow her vices. Laun. Close at the heels of her virtues. Speed. Item, She is not to be kissed fasting, in respect of her breath. Duke. This weak impress of love is as a figure Duke. My daughter takes his going grievously. (For thou hast shown some sign of good desert,) Pro. Longer than I prove loyal to your grace, Duke. Thou know'st, how willingly I would effect Duke. And also, I think, thou art not ignorant Pro. She did, my lord, when Valentine was here. Duke. Then you must undertake to slander him. [him, Duke. Where your good word cannot advantage Pro. You have prevail'd, my lord: if I can do it, [him, in this Thu. Therefore, as you unwind her love from Pro. As much as I can do, I will effect :- Duke. Ay, much the force of heaven-bred poesy. ACT IV. SCENE I-A Forest, near Mantua. Enter certain Outlaws. 1 Out. Fellows, stand fast; I see a passenger. 2 Out. If there be ten, shrink not, but down 3 Out. Stand, sir, and throw us that you have If not, we'll make you sit, and rifle you. Speed. Sir, we are undone! these are the villains That all the travellers do fear so much. 1 Out. That's not so, sir; we are your enemies. Val. Then know, that I have little wealth to A man I am, crossed with adversity: My riches are these poor habiliments, Of which if you should here disfurnish me, Val. For that which now torments me to re- I kill'd a man, whose death I much repent; But yet I slew him manfully in fight, Without false vantage, or base treachery. 1 Out. Why, ne'er repent it, if it were done so. But were you banish'd for so small a fault? Val. I was, and held me glad of such a doom. Val. My youthful travel therein made me happy; Or else I often had been miserable. 3 Out. By the bare scalp of Robin Hood's fat This fellow were a king for our wild faction. [friar, 3 Out. Know then, that some of us are gentle- Such as the fury of ungovern'd youth Thrast from the company of awful men: Myself was from Verona banish'd, For practising to steal away a lady, An heir, and near allied unto the duke. For Orpheus' lute was strung with poets' sinews; Whose golden touch could soften steel and stones, Make tigers tame, and huge leviathans Forsake unsounded deeps to dance on sands. After your dire lamenting elegies, 1 Out. And I, for such like petty crimes as these. Visit by night your lady's chamber-window, But to the purpose,-(for we cite our faults, With some sweet concert: to their instruments That they may hold excus'd our lawless lives,) Tune a deploring dump; the night's dead silence And, partly, seeing you are beautified Will well become such sweet complaining griev. With goodly shape; and by your own report This, or else nothing, will inherit her. [ance, A linguist; and a man of such perfection, Duke. This discipline shows thou hast been in As we do in our quality much want;- 2 Out. Indeed, because you are a banish'd man, Thu. And thy advice this night I'll put in prac- Therefore, above the rest, we parley to you: Let us into the city presently To sort some gentlemen well skill'd in musick: I have a sonnet that will serve the turn, To give the onset to thy good advice. Pro. We'll wait upon your grace, till after supper; Pro. Already have I been false to Valentine, She twits me with my falsehood to my friend : Enter Thurio and Musicians. Thu. How now, sir Proteus? are you crept be. fore us? Pro. Ay, gentle Thurio; for, you know, that love Thu. Ay, but, I hope, sir, that you love not here. Pro. Ay, Silvia,-for your sake. Thu. I thank you for your own. Now, gentlemen, Let's tune, and to it lustily awhile. Enter Host, at a distance; and Julia in boy's clothes. Host. Now, my young guest: methinks you're allycholly; I pray you, why is it? Jul. Marry, mine host, because I cannot be merry. Host. Come, we'll have you merry: I'll bring you where you shall hear musick, and see the gentleman that you ask'd for. Jul. But shall I hear him speak? Jul. That will be musick. Host. Hark! hark! Jul. Is he among these? [Musick plays. 'Host. Ay: but peace, let's hear 'em. SONG. Who is Silvia? what is she, That all our swains commend her? The heavens such grace did lend her, Is she kind, as she is fair? For beauty lives with kindness: To help him of his blindness; That Silvia is excelling; Host. How now? are you sadder than you were How do you, man? the musick likes you not. Jul. He plays false, father. Host. How? out of tune on the strings? Jul. Not so; but yet so false that he grieves my very heart-strings. Host. You have a quick ear. Jul. Ay, I would I were deaf! it makes me have a slow heart. Host. I perceive, you delight not in musick. Host. Hark, what fine change is in the musick! Host. You would have them always play but one thing? Jul. I would always have one play but one thing. But, host, doth this sir Proteus, that we talk on, often resort unto this gentlewoman? Host. I tell you what Launce, his man, told me, he loved her out of all nick. Jul. Where is Launce? Host. Gone to seek his dog; which, to-morrow, by his master's command, he must carry for a present to his lady. Jul. Peace! stand aside! the company parts. Pro. At saint Gregory's well. Thu. Farewell. [Exeunt Thurio and Musicians. Pro. Madam, good even to your ladyship. [truth, Pro. Sir Proteus, gentle lady, and your servant. Pro. That I may compass yours. I That hast deceiv'd so many with thy vows? Jul. 'Twere false, if I should speak it; [Aside. Sil. Say, that she be; yet Valentine, thy friend, Survives; to whom, thyself art witness, I am betroth'd: And art thou not asham'd To wrong him with thy importunacy? Assure thyself, my love is buried. Pro. Sweet lady, let me rake it from the earth. [Aside. Pro. Madam, if your heart be so obdurate, ceive it, And make it but a shadow, as I am. [Aside. Sil. I am very loth to be your idol, sir; Pro. [Exeunt Proteus; and Silvia, from above. Jul. Host, will you go? Host. By my hallidon, I was fast asleep. Egl. This is the hour that madam Silvia Entreated me to call, and know her mind; There's some great matter she'd employ me in.Madam, madam ! Silvia appears above, at her window. Sil. Who calls? Sil. O Eglamour, thou art a gentleman, That I may venture to depart alone. with [plagues. Egl. Madam, I pity much your grievances; As much I wish all good befortune you. Sil. This evening coming. Egl. Where shall I meet you? for't: you shall judge. He thrusts me himself into the company of three or four gentleman-like dogs, under the duke's table: he had not been there (bless the mark) a pissing while; but all the chamber smelt him. Out with the dog, says one; What cur is that? says another; Whip him out, says a third; Hang him up, says the duke. I, having been acquainted with the smell before, knew it was Crab; and goes me to the fellow that whips the dogs: Friend, quoth I, you mean to whip the dog? Ay, marry, do I, quoth he. You do him the more wrong, quoth I; 'twas I did the thing you wot of. He makes no more ado, but whips me out of the chamber. How many masters would do this for their servant? Nay, I'll be sworn, I have sat in the stocks for puddings he hath stolen, otherwise he had been executed: I have stood on the pillory for geese he hath killed, otherwise he had suffered for't: thou think'st not of this now!-Nay, I remember the trick you served me, when I took my leave of madam Silvia; did not I bid thee still mark me, and do as I do? When did'st thou see me heave up my leg, and make water against a gentlewoman's farthingale ? did'st thou ever see me do such a trick? Enter Proteus and Julia. Pro. Sebastian is thy name? I like thee well, And will employ thee in some service presently. Jul. In what you please;-I will do what I can. Pro.. I hope, thou wilt.-How now, you whoreson peasant? [To Launce. Where have you been these two days loitering? Laun. Marry, sir, I carried mistress Silvia the dog you bade me. Pro. And what says she to my little jewel? Laun. Marry, she says, your dog was a cur; and tells you, currish thanks is good enough for such a present. Pro. But she received my dog? Laun. No, indeed, she did not: here have I brought him back again. Pro. What, didst thou offer her this from me? me by the hangman's boys in the market-place: Laun. Ay, sir; the other squirrel was stolen from and then I offered her mine own; who is a dog as big as ten of yours, and therefore the gift the greater. Pro. Go, get thee hence, and find my dog again, Or ne'er return again into my sight. Away, I say: Stay'st thou to vex me here? Sebastian, I have entertain'd thee, At friar Patrick's cell, Where I intend holy confession. Jul. It seems, you loved her not, to leave her token: Pro. Jul. Alas! Not so; I think, she lives. Pro. Why dost thou cry, alas! Jul. I cannot choose but pity her? Jul. Because, methinks, that she loved you as [well Sil. Good morrow, kind sir Eglamour. SCENE IV.-The same. Enter Launce, with his dog. When a man's servant shall play the cur with him, look you, it goes hard: one that I brought up of a puppy; one that I saved from drowning, when three or four of his blind brothers and sisters went to it! I have taught him-even as one would say precisely, Thus I would teach a dog. I was sent As you do love your lady Silvia : to deliver him, as a present to mistress Silvia, from She dreams on him, th t has forgot her love; my master; and I came no sooner into the dining-You dote on her, that cares not for your love. chamber, but he steps me to her trencher, and steals 'Tis pity, love should be so contrary; her capon's leg. O, 'tis a foul thing when a cur And thinking on it makes me cry, alas! cannot keep himself in all companies! I would Pro. Well, give her that ring, and therewithal have, as one should say, one that takes upon him to This letter;-that's her chamber.-Tell my lady, be a dog indeed, to be, as it were, a dog at all I claim the promise for her heavenly picture. things. If I had not had more wit than he, to take Your message done, hie home unto my chamber, afault upon me that he did, I think verily he had Where thou shalt find me sad and solitary. been hanged for't; sure as I live he had suffered [Exit Proteus. |