Dum. Ay, marry, there ;-some flattery for this evil.

Long. O, some authority how to proceed; Some tricks, some quillets, how to cheat the devil. Dum. Some salve for perjury.

Biron,
O, 'tis more than need!
Have at you then, affection's men at arms:
Consider, what you first did swear unto ;—
To fast, to study, and to see no woman ;-
Flat treason 'gainst the kingly state of youth..
Say, can you fast? your stomachs are too young;
And abstinence engenders maladies.

And where that you have vow'd to study, lords,
In that each of you hath forsworn his book:
Can you still dream, and pore, and thereon look?
For when would you, my lord, or you, or you,
Have found the ground of study's excellence,
Without the beauty of a woman's face?

From women's eyes this doctrine I derive: ...
They are the ground, the books, the academes,
From whence doth spring the true Promethean fire.
Why, universal plodding prisons up
The nimble spirits in the arteries;

As motion, and long during action, tires
The sinewy vigour of the traveller. 7.
Now, for not looking on a woman's face,
You have in that forsworn the use of eyes;
And study too, the causer of your vow:
For where is any author in the world,
Teaches such beauty as a woman's eye?
Learning is but an adjunct to ourself,
And where we are, our learning likewise is.
Then, when ourselves we see in ladies' eyes,
Do we not likewise see our learning there?
O, we have made a vow to study, lords;
And in that vow we have forsworn our books;
For when would you, my liege, or you, or you,
In leaden contemplation, have found out
Such fiery numbers, as the prompting eyes
Of beauteous tutors have enrich'd you with?
Other slow arts entirely keep the brain;
And therefore finding barren practisers,
Scarce show a harvest of their heavy toil:
But love, first learned in a lady's eyes,
Lives not alone immured in the brain;
But with the motion of all elements,
Courses as swift as thought in every power;
And gives to every power a double power,
Above their functions and their offices.
It adds a precious seeing to the eye;
A lover's eyes will gaze an eagle blind;
A lover's ear will hear the lowest sound,
When the suspicious head of theft is stopp'd;
Love's feeling is more soft, and sensible,
Than are the tender horns of cockled snails;

Still climbing trees in the Hesperides? Subtle as sphinx; as sweet, and musical,

A

As bright Apollo's lute, strung with his hair;
And, when love speaks, the voice of all the gods
Makes heaven drowsy with the harmony.
Never durst poet touch a pen to write,

Until his ink were temper'd with love's sighs;
O, then his lines would ravish savage ears,
And plant in tyrants mild humility.
From women's eyes this doctrine I derive:
They sparkle still the right Promethean fire;
They are the books, the arts, the academes,
That show, contain, and nourish all the world;
Else, none at all in ought proves excellent:
Then fools you were these women to forswear;
Or, keeping what is sworn, you will prove fools.
For wisdom's sake, a word that all men love;
Or for love's sake, a word that loves all men ;
Or for men's sake, the authors of these women;
Or women's sake, by whom we men are men;
Let us once lose our oaths, to find ourselves,
Or else we lose ourselves to keep our oaths:
It is religion to be thus forsworn:
For charity itself fulfils the law;
And who can sever love from charity?

Hol. Ba, puerifia, with a horn added.
Moth. Ba, most silly sheep, with a horn:-You

hear his learning.

for that worthy's thumb: he is not so big as the end of his club.

Hol. Shall I have audience? he shall present Hercules in minority: his enter and exit shall be

Hol. I will repeat them, a, e, i.

Moth. The sheep: the other two concludes it; o, u.

Arm. Now, by the salt wave of the Mediterraneum, a sweet touch, a quick venew of wit snip, snap, quick and home! it rejoiceth my intellect: true wit.

Moth. Offer'd by a child to an old man; which is wit-old.

Hol. What is the figure? what is the figure? Moth. Horns.

Hol. Thou disputest like an infant: go, whip thy

gig.

Moth. Lend me your horn to make one, and I will whip about your infamy circum circa; A gig of a cuckold's horn!

Cost. An I had but one penny in the world, thou shouldst have it to buy ginger-bread: hold, there is the very remuneration I had of thy master, thou half-penny purse of wit, thou pigeon-egg of discretion. O, an the heavens were so pleased, that thou' wert but my bastard! what a joyful father. wouldst thou make me! Go to, thou hast it ad dunghill, at the fingers' ends, as they say.

Hol. O, I smell false Latin; dunghill for unguem. Arm. Arts-man, præambula; we will be singled from the barbarous. Do you not educate youth at the charge-house on the top of the mountain ? Hol. Or, mons, the hill.

Arm. At your sweet pleasure, for the mountain. Hol. I do, sans question.

Arm. Sir, it is the king's most sweet pleasure and affection, to congratulate the princess at her pavilion, in the posteriors of this day; which the rude multitude call, the afternoon.

Hol. The posterior of the day, most generous sir, is liable, congruent, and measurable for the after noon: the word is well cull'd, chose; sweet and apt, I do assure you, sir, I do assure.

Arm. Sir, the king is a noble gentleman; and my familiar, I do assure you, very good friend:For what is inward between us, let it pass:-I do beseech thee, remember thy courtesy-I beseech. thee, apparel thy head; and among other importunate and most serious designs, and of great import indeed, too; -but let that pass:-for I must tell the thee, it will please his grace (by the world) sometime to lean upon my poor shoulder; and with his royal finger, thus, dally with my excrement, with my mustachio: but, sweet heart, let that pass. By the world, I recount no fable; some certain special honours it pleaseth his greatness to impart to Armado, a soldier, a man of travel, that hath seen the world: but let that pass. The very all of all is, but, sweet heart, I do implore secrecy, that the king would have me present the princess, sweet chuck, with some delightful ostentation, or show, or pageant, or antick, or fire-work. Now, understanding that the curate and your sweet self, are good at such eruptions, and sudden breaking out of mirth, as it were, I have acquainted you withal, to the end to crave your assistance.

for that purpose.

Moth. An excellent device! so, if any of the audience hiss, you may cry: well done, Hercules! now thou crushest the snake! that is the way to make an offence gracious; though few have the grace to do it.

Arm. For the rest of the worthies ?
Hol. I will play three myself.
Moth. Thrice-worthy gentleman!
Arm. Shall I tell you a thing?

Hol. We attend.

rhyme,

As would be cramm'd up in a sheet of paper,
Writ on both sides the leaf, margent and all;
That he was fain to seal on Cupid's name.

Ros. That was the way to make his god-head wax;
For he hath been five thousand years a boy.
Kath. Ay, and a shrewd unhappy gallows too.
Ros. You'll ne'er be friends with him; he kill'd
your sister.

Kath. He made her melancholy, sad, and heavy;
And so she died: had she been light, like you,
Of such a merry, nimble, stirring spirit,
She might have been a grandam ere she died:
And so may you for a light heart lives long.
Ros. What's your dark meaning, mouse, of this
light word?

Kath. A light condition in a beauty dark.
Ros. We need more light to find your meaning

out.

Kath. You'll mar the light, by taking it in snuff; Therefore, I'll darkly end the argument. Ros. Look, what you do, you do it still i' the dark. Kath. So do not you; for you are a light wench. Ros, Indeed, I weigh not you; and therefore light. [for me. Kath. You weigh me not,-0, that's you care not Ros. Great reason; for, Past cure is still past care. Prin. Well bandied both; a set of wit well play'd. But Rosaline, you have a favour too: Who sent it? and what is it?

I would, you knew?

say, none so fit as to present the nine worthies.

Nath. Where will you find men worthy enough

to present them?

The numbers true; and, were the numb'ring too,
I were the fairest goddess on the ground:
I am compar'd to twenty thousand fairs.
O, he hath drawn my picture in his letter!

Hol. Joshua, yourself; myself, or this gallant gentleman, Judas Maccabœus; this swain, because of his great limb or joint, shall pass Pompey the great; the page, Hercules.

Arm. Pardon, sir, error: he Is not quantity enough

Prin. Any thing like ?

Ros. Much, in the letters; nothing in the praise Prin. Beauteous as ink; a good conclusion. Kath. Fair as a text B in a copy-book. [debtor, Ros. 'Ware pencils! How? let me not die your

My red dominical, my golden letter:

O, that your face was not so full of O's!

Kath. A A pox of that jest! and beshrew all shrows! Prin. But what was sent to you from fair Dumain? Kath. Madam, this glove.

Prin.

Did he not send you twain?

Kath. Yes, madam; and moreover,
Some thousand verses of a faithful lover;

A huge translation of hypocrisy,
Vitely compil'd, profound simplicity.

Mar. This, and these pearls, to me sent LongaThe letter is too long by half a mile.

[ville;

Prin. I think no less: Dost thou not wish in heart,

The chain were longer, and the letter short?

Mar. Ay, or I would these hands might never part.

Prin. We are wise girls, to mock our lovers so. 5 Rot. They are worse fools to purchase mocking so. That same Biron I'll torture ere I go.

0, that I knew he were but in by the week!
How I would make him fawn, and beg, and seek;
And wait the season, and observe the times,

And spend his prodigal wits in bootless rhymes;
And shape his service wholly to my behests;
And make him proud to make me proud that jests!
So portent-like would I o'ersway his state,

That he should be my fool, and I his fate.

With that, they all did tumble on the ground, A

With such a zealous laughter, so profound,
That in this spleen ridiculous appears,
To check their folly, passion's solemn tears.

Prin. But what, but what, come they to visit us?
Boyet. They do, they do; and are apparel'd

thus,

Like Muscovites, or Russians: as I guess,
Their purpose is, to parle, to court, and dance:
And every one his love-feat will advance
Unto his several mistress; which they'll know
By favours several, which they did bestow.
Prin. And will they so? the he gallants shall be
task'd:-

For, ladies, we will every one be mask'd;
And not a man of them shall have the grace,
Despite of suit, to see a lady's face..
Hold, Rosaline, this favour thou shalt wear;
And then the king will court thee for his dear;
Hold, take thou this, my sweet, and give me thine;
So shall Biron take me for Rosaline.

And change your favours too; so shall your loves
Woo contrary, deceiv'd by these removes.

Ros. Come on then; wear the favours most in

They do it but in mocking merriment;

they,

a

What are

That charge their breath against us? say, scout, say.
Boyet. Under the cool shade of sycamore,
I thought to close mine eyes some half an hour:
When, lo! to interrupt my purpos'd rest,
Toward that shade I might behold addrest
The king and his companions: warily
I stole into a neighbour thicket by,
And overheard what you shall overhear;
That, by and by, disguis'd they will be here.
Their herald is a pretty knavish page,

That well by heart hath conn'd his embassage:
Action, and accent, did they teach him there;
Thus must thou speak, and thus thy body bear
And ever and anon they made a doubt,
Presence majestical would put him out;
For, quoth the king, An angel shalt thou see;
Yet fear not thou, but speak audaciously.
The boy reply'd, An angel is not evil;

I should have fear'd her, had she been a devil.
With that all laugh'd, and clapp'd him on the

shoulder;

1

Making the bold wag by their praises bolder.
One rubb'd his elbow, thus; and fleer'd, and swore,
A better speech was never spoke before:
Another with his finger and his thumb,
Cry'd, Via! we will do't, come what will come
The third he caper'd, and cried, All goes well:
The fourth turn'd on the toe, and down he fell.

Their several counsels they unbosom shall
To loves mistook; and so be mock'd withal,
Upon the next occasion that we meet,

With visages display'd, to talk and greet.
Ros. But shall we dance, if they desire us to't?
Prin. No; to the death, we will not move a foot:
Nor to their penn'd speech render we no grace:
But, while 'tis spoke, each turn away her face.
Boyet. Why, that contempt will kill the speaker's

heart,

7

)

And quite divorce his memory from his part. Prin. Therefore I do it; and, I make no doubt, The rest will ne'er come in, if he be out. There's no such sport, as sport by sport o'erthrown; To make theirs ours, and ours none but our own: So shall we stay, mocking intended game; And they well mock'd, depart away with shame. [Trumpets sound within. Boyet. The trumpet sounds; be mask'd, the maskers come. [The ladies mask. Enter the King, Biron, Longaville, and Dumain, in Russian habits, and masked; Moth, Musicians, and Attendants.

Moth. All hail the richest beauties on the earth! Boyet. Beauties no richer than rich taffata. Moth. A holy parcel of the fairest dames,

The ladies turn their backs to him.

That ever turn'd their backs to mortal views!
Biron. Their eyes, villain, their eyes.

Moth. That ever turn'd their eyes to mortal views! Out

Boyet. True; out, indeed.

Moth. Out of your favours, heavenly spirits vouchNot to behold

Of many weary miles you have o'ergone,

Are number'd in the travel of one mile ?

Biron. We number nothing that we spend for

Our duty is so rich, so infinite,

That we may do it still without accompt.
Vouchsafe to show the sunshine of your face,
That we, like savages, may worship it.

[you;

Ros. My face is but a moon, and clouded too.

King. Blessed are clouds, to do as such clouds do! Vouchsafe, bright moon, and these thy stars, to

shine (Those clouds remov'd,) upon our wat'ry eyne. Ros. O vain petitioner! beg a greater matter; Thou now request'st but moonshine in the water. King. Then, in measure do but vouchsafe

soon.

moon.

our

one change: Thou bid'st me beg; this begging is not strange. Ros. Play, musick, then nay, you must do it [Musick plays. Not yet;-no dance:-thus change I like the King. Will you not dance? How come you thus estrang'd ? [chang'd. Ros. You took the moon at full; but now she's King. Yet still she is the moon, on, and I the man. The musick plays; vouchsafe some motion to it. Ros. Our ears vouchsafe it. King.

But your legs should do it. Ros. Since you are strangers, and come here by chance, [dance. We'll not be nice take hands; we will not King. Why take we hands then ?

4

Ros. Only to part friends: Court'sy, sweet hearts; and so the measure ends. King. More measure of this measure; be not

nice.

Ros. We can afford no more at such a price. King. Prize you yourselves; What buys your Ros. Your absence only. [company? King. That can never be. Ros. Then cannot we be bought and so adieu; Twice to your visor, and half once to you! King. If you deny to dance, let's hold more chat. Ros. In private then. King.

I am best pleas'd with that. [They converse apart. Biron. White-handed mistress, one sweet word with thee. [three. Prin. Honey, and milk, and sugar; there is Biron. Nay then, two treys, (an if you grow so

nice,) Metheglin, wort, and malmsey; -Well run, dice! There's half a dozen sweets. Seventh sweet, adieu!

Prin.

Since you can cog, I'll play no more with you.

Biron. One word in secret.
Prin.

Biron. Thou griev'st my gall.

Prin.

Biron.

Let it not be sweet.

Gall? bitter.

Therefore meet.

[They converse apart.

[word?

Fair lady,-
Take that for your fair lady.
As much in private, and I'll bid adieu.
[They converse apart.
Kath. What, was your visor made without a

Say you so ? Fair lord,-
Please it you,

Dum.

No, a fair lord calf.

Long. Let's part the word. Kath.

No, I'll not be your half:

Take all, and wean it; it may prove an ox.
Long. Look, how you butt yourself in these

sharp mocks!

Will you give horns, chaste lady? do not so.
Kath. Then die a calf, before your horns do grow.
Long. One word in private with you, ere I die.
Kath. Bleat softly then, the butcher hears you cry.
[They converse apart.
Boyet. The tongues of mocking wenches are as
As is the razor's edge invisible,
[keen
Cutting a smaller hair than may be seen;

Above the sense of sense: so sensible [wings, Seemeth their conference; their conceits have Fleeter than arrows, bullets, wind, thought, swifter [break off. Ros. Not one word more, my maids; break off, Biron. By heaven, all dry-beaten with pure scoff! King. Farewell, mad wenches; you have simple

things.

wits.

[Exeunt King, Lords, Moth, Musick, and Attend. ants. Prin. Twenty adieus, my frozen Muscovites.Are these the breed of wits so wonder'd at? Boyet. Tapers they are, with your sweet breaths puff'd out. [fat, fat. Ros. Well-liking wits they have; gross, gross; Prin. O poverty in wit, kingly-poor flout! Will they not, think you, hang themselves to night? Or ever, but in visors, show their faces ? This pert Biron was out of countenance quite. Ros. O! they were alt in lamentable cases! The king was weeping-ripe for a good word. Prin. Biron did swear himself out of all suit. Mar. Dumain was at my service, and his sword: No point, quoth I; my servant straight was mute. Kath. Lord Longaville said, I came o'er his heart; And trow you, what he call'd me ?

Go, sickness as thou art! Ros. Well, better wits have worn plain statute. caps.

But will you hear? the king is my love sworn.
Prin. And quick Biron hath plighted faith to me.
Kath. And Longaville was for my service born.
Mar. Dumain is mine, as sure as bark on tree.
Boyet. Madam, and pretty mistresses, give ear:
Immediately they will again be here
In their own shapes; for it can never be,
They will digest this harsh indignity.
Prin. Will they return?

Boyet.

They will, they will, God knows, And leap for joy, though they are lame with blows: Therefore, change favours; and, when they repair, Blow like sweet roses in this summer air. [stood. Prin. How blow? how blow? speak to be under Boyet. Fair ladies, mask'd, are roses in their bud: Dismask'd, their damask sweet commixture shown, Are angels vailing clouds, or roses blown.

Prin. Avaunt, perplexity! What shall we do, If they return in their own shapes to woo? Ros. Good madam, if by me you'll be advis'd, Let's mock them still, as well known, as disguis'd: Let us complain to them what fools were here, Disguis'd like Muscovites, in shapeless gear;

Prin. Whip to our tents, as roes run over land. [Exeunt Princess, Ros. Kath. and Maria. Enter the King, Biron, Longaville, and Dumain, in their proper habits.

King. Fair sir, God save you! Where is the princess?

Boyet. Gone to her tent: Please it your majesty, Cominand me any service to her thither? King. That she vouchsafe me audience for one word.

Boyet. I will; and so will she, I know, my lord.
[Exit.
Biron. This fellow pecks up wit, as pigeons peas;
And utters it again when God doth please:
He is wit's pedler; and retails his wares
At wakes, and wassels, meetings, markets, fairs;
And we that sell by gross, the Lord doth know,
Have not the grace to grace it with such show.
This gallant pins the wenches on his sleeve;
Had he been Adam, he had tempted Eve:
He can carve too, and lisp: Why, this is he,
That kiss'd away his hand in courtesy;

This is the ape of form, monsieur the nice,
That, when he plays at tables, chides the dice
In honourable terms; nay, he can sing
A mean most meanly; and, in ushering,
Mend hi him who can: the ladies call him, sweet;
The stairs, as he treads on them, kiss his feet:
This is the flower that smiles on every one,
To show his teeth as white as whales bone:
And consciences, that will not die in debt,
Pay him the due of honey-tongued Boyet.
King. A blister on his sweet tongue, with my
That put Armado's page out of his part!
[heart,
Enter the Princess, ushered by Boyet; Rosaline,
Maria, Katharine, and Attendants.

Biron. See where it comes!-Behaviour, what

wert thou,

Till this man show'd thee? and what art thou now? King. All hail, sweet madam, and fair time of day!

Prin. Fair, in all hail, is foul, as I conceive. King. Construe my speeches better, if you may. Prin. Then wish me better, I will give you leave. King. We came to visit you; and purpose now To lead you to our court: vouchsafe it then. Prin. This field shall hold me; and so hold your

vow:

Nor God, nor I, delight in perjur'd men. King. Rebuke me not for that which you provoke; The virtue of your eye must break my oath. Prin. You nick-name virtue: vice you should

have spoke:

For virtue's office never breaks men's troth.

Now, by my maiden honour, yet as pure
As the unsullied lily, I protest,

A world of torments though I should endure,
I would not yield to be your house's guest:

So much I hate a breaking cause to be
Of heavenly oaths, vow'd with integrity.
King. O, you have liv'd in desolation here,
Unseen, unvisited, much to our shame.
Prin. Not so, my lord, it is not so, I swear;
We have had pastimes here, and pleasant

A mess of Russians left us but of late.

King, How, madam? Russians ?

Prin.

[game;

Ay, in truth, my lord;

Trim gallants, full of courtship, and of state.

Ros. Madam, speak true:-It is not so, my lord;

My lady, (to the manner of the days,)

In courtesy, gives undeserving praise.

We four

Ve four, indeed, confronted here with four In Russian habit; here they staid an hour, And talk'd apace; and in that hour, my lord,

:

They did not bless us with one happy word.
I dare not call them fools; but this I think,
When they are thirsty, fools would fain have drink.
Biron. This jest is dry to me. - Fair, gentle sweet,
Your wit makes wise things foolish; when we greet
With eyes best seeing heaven's fiery eye,
By light we lose light: Your capacity
Is of that nature, that to your huge store
Wise things seem foolish, and rich things but poor.
Ros. This proves you wise and rich, for in my
Biron. I am a fool, and full of poverty. [eye,-
Ros. But that you take what doth to you belong,
It were a fault to snatch words from my tongue.
Biron. O, I am yours, and all that I possess.
Ros. All the fool mine?
Biron.
I cannot give you less.
Ros. Which of the visors was it, that you wore ?
Biron. Where? when? what visor? why de-

mand you this?

Ros. There, then, that visor; that superfluous

perjury,

Can any face of brass hold longer out? Here stand I, lady; dart thy skill at me;

Bruise me with scorn, confound me with a flout; Thrust thy sharp wit quite through my ignorance; Cut me to pieces with thy keen conceit; And I will wish thee never more to dance, Nor never more in Russian habit wait. O! never will I trust to speeches penn'd, Nor never come in visor to my friend;

Nor to the motion of a school-boy's tongue;

Nor woo in rhyme, like a blind harper's song; Taffata phrases, silken terms precise, Three-pil'd hyperboles, spruce affectation, Figures pedantical; these summer-flies Have blown me full of maggot ostentation: I do forswear them and I here protest,

By this white glove, (how white the hand, God
knows!)

Henceforth my wooing mind shall be express'd
In russet yeas, and honest kersey noes:
And, to begin, wench, so God help me, la!
My love to thee is sound, sans crack or flaw.
Ros. Sans sans, I pray you.
Biron.

Yet I have a trick

[to us.

Of the old rage:-bear with me, I am sick;
I'll leave it by degrees. Soft, let us see;
Write, Lord have mercy on us, on those three;
They are infected, in their hearts it lies;
They have the plague, and caught it of your eyes:
These lords are visited; you are not free,
For the Lord's tokens on you do I see.
Prin. No, they are free, that gave these tokens
Biron. Our states are forfeit, seek not to undo us.
Ros. It is not so; For how can this be true,
That you stand forfeit, being those that sue?
Biron. Peace; for I will not have to do with you.
Ros. Nor shall not, if I do as I intend.