between his lord and my niece confirms no less; therefore this letter, being so excellently ignorant, will breed no terror in the youth, he will find it comes from a clodpole. But, sir, I will deliver his challenge by word of mouth; set upon Ague-cheek a notable report of valour; and drive the gentleman, (as, I know his youth will aptly receive it,) into a most hideous opinion of his rage, skill, fury, and impetuosity. This will so so fright them both, that they will kill one another by the look, like cockatrices. Enter Olivia and Viola. Fab. Here he comes with your niece: give them way, till he take leave, and presently after him. Sir To. I will meditate the while upon some horrid message for a challenge. Exeunt Sir Toby, Fabian, and Maria. Oli. I have said too much unto a heart of stone, And laid mine honour too unchary out : There's something in me, that reproves my fault; But such a headstrong potent fault it is, That it but mocks reproof. [Exit. Bu Fab. If this were played upon a stage now, I could condemn it as an improbable fiction. Sir To. His very genius hath taken the infection of the device, man. Mar. Nay, pursue him now; lest the device take air, and taint... Fab. Why, we shall make him mad, indeed. Sir To. Come, we'll have him in a dark room, and bound. My niece is already in the belief that he is mad; we may carry it thus, for our pleasure, and his penance, till our very pastime, tired out of breath, prompt us to have mercy on him: at which time, we will bring the device to the bar, and crown thee for a finder of madmen. But see, but see. Enter Sir Andrew Ague-cheek. Fab. More matter for a May morning. rant, there's vinegar and pepper in't. Fab. Is't so sawcy? Sir And. Ay, is it, I warrant him: do but read. Sir To. Give me. [reads.] Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow. Fab. Good, and valiant. Sir To. Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind, why I do call thee 80, for I will show thee no reason for't. Fab. A good note that keeps you from the blow of the law. Sir To. Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and in my sight she usesthee kindly: but thou liest in thy throat, that that is not the matter I challenge thee for. Fab. Very brief, and exceeding good sense-less. it be thy chance to kill me, Fab. Good. Sir To. Thou killest me like a rogue and a villain. Rab. Still you keep o' the windy side of the law Good. Sir To. If this letter move him not, his legs cannot: I'll give't him. Mar. You may have very fit occasion for't; he is now in some commerce with my lady, and will by and by depart. Vio. With the same 'haviour that your passion Go on my master's griefs. [bears, :: Oli. Here, wear this jewel for me, 'tis my picture; Refuse it not, it hath no tongue to vex you: And, I beseech you, come again to-morrow. What shall you ask of me, that I'll deny; That honour, sav'd, may upon asking give? [ter. Vio. Nothing but this, your true love for my masOli. How with mine honour may I give him that Which I have given to you ? Vio. I will acquit you. Oli. Well, come again to-morrow: Fare thee well; A fiend, like thee, might bear my soul to hell. [Exil. Re-enter Sir Toby Belch and Fabian. Sir To. Gentleman, God save thee. Sir To. That defence thou hast, betake thee to't: of what nature the wrongs are thou hast done him, I know not; but thy intercepter, full of despight, bloody as the hunter, attends thee at the orchard end: dismount thy tuck, be yare in thy preparation, for thy assailant is quick, skilful, and deadly. Vio. You mistake, sir; I am sure, no man hath any quarrel to me my remembrance is very free and clear from any image of offence done to any man. Sir To. You'll find it otherwise, I assure you: therefore, if you hold your life at any price, betake you to your guard; for your opposite hath in him what youth, strength, skill, and wrath, can furnish man withal. Vio. I pray you, sir, what is he? Sir To. He is knight, dubbed with unhacked rapier, and on carpet consideration; but he is a devil in private brawl; souls and bodies hath he divorced three; and his incensement at this moment is so implacable, that satisfaction can be none but by pangs of death and sepulchre: hob, nob, is his word; give't or take't. Vio. I will return again into the house, and desire some conduct of the lady. I am no fighter. I have heard of some kind of men, that put quarrels purposely on others, to taste their valour: belike, this is a man of that quirk. Sir To. Sir, no; his indignation derives itself out of a very competent injury; therefore, get you on, and give him his desire. Back you shall not to the house, unless you undertake that with me, which with as much safety you might answer him: therefore, on, or strip your sword stark naked; for meddle you must, that's certain, or forswear to wear iron about you. Sir To. Go, sir Andrew; scout me for him at the corner of the orchard, like a bum-bailiff: so soon as ever thou seest him, draw; and, as thou drawest, swear horrible; for it comes to pass oft, that a ter- Vio. This is as uncivil, as strange. I beseech you, rible oath, with a swaggering accent sharply twang- do me this courteous office, as to know of the knight ed off, gives manhood more approbation than ever proof itself would have earned him. A way. Sir And. Nay, let me alone for swearing. [Exit. Sir To. Now will not I deliver his letter: for the behaviour of the young gentleman gives him out to be of good capacity and breeding; his employment what my offence to him is; it is something of my negligence, nothing of my purpose. Sir To. I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this gentleman till my return. [Exit Sir Toby. Vio. Pray you, sir, do you know of this matter? Fab. I know, the knight is incensed against you, even to a mortal arbitrement; but nothing of the circumstance more. Vio. I beseech you, what manner of man is he? Fab. Nothing of that wonderful promise, to read him by his form, as you are like to find him in the proof of his valour. He is, indeed, sir, the most skilful, bloody, and fatal opposite that you could possibly have found in any part of Illyria: Will you walk towards him? I will make your peace with him, if I can. Vio. I shall be much bound to you for't: I am one, that would rather go with sir priest, than sir knight I care not who knows so much of my mettle. [Exeunt. Re-enter Sir Toby, with Sir Andrew. Sir To. Why, man, he's a very devil; I have not seen such a virago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard, and all, and he gives me the stuck-in, with such a mortal motion, that it is inevitable; and on the answer, he pays you as surely as your feet hit the ground they step on: They say, he has been fencer to the Sophy. Sir And. Pox on't, I'll not meddle with him. Sir To. Ay, but he will not now be pacified: Fabian can scarce hold him yonder. Sir And. Plague on't; an I thought he had been valiant, and so cunning in fence, I'd have seen him damned ere I'd have challenged him. Let him let the matter slip, and I'll give him my horse, gray Capilet. Sir To. I'll make the motion: Stand here, make a good show on't; this shall end without the perdition of souls: Marry, Ill ride your horse as well as I ride you. [Aside. Re-enter Fabian and Viola. I have his horse [to Fab.] to take up the quarrel; I have persuaded him the youth's a devil. Fab. He is as horribly conceited of him; and pants, and looks pale, as if a bear were at his heels. Sir To. There's no remedy, sir; he will fight with you for his oath sake: marry, he hath better bethought him of his quarrel, and he finds that now scarce to be worth talking off: therefore draw, for the supportance of his vow; he protests, he will not hurt you. Vio. Pray God defend me! A little thing would make me tell them how much I lack of a man. Aside. Fab. Give ground, if you see him furious. Sir To. Come, sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the gentleman will, for his honour's sake, have one bout with you: he cannot by the duello avoid it; but he has promised me, as he is a gentleman and a soldier, he will not hurt you. Come on: to't. Sir And. Pray God, he keep his oath. [Draws. Enter Antonio. Vio. I do assure you 'tis against my will. [Draws. Ant. Put up your sword;-If this young gentleman Have done offence, I take the fault on me; Enter two Officers. Fab. O good sir Toby, hold; here come the officers. Sir To. I'll be with you anon. [To Antonio. Vio. Pray, sir, put up your sword, if you please. [To Sir Andrew. Sir And. Marry, will I, sir; and, for that I promised you, I'll be as good as my word: He will bear you easily, and reins reins well. 1 Off. This is the man; do thy office. 2 Off. Antonio, I arrest thee at the suit Of count Orsino. Ant. You do mistake me, sir; 1 Off. No, sir, no jot; I know your favour well, Though now you have no sea-cap on your head.Take him away; he knows, I know him well. Ant. I must obey. This comes with seeking you; But there's no remedy; I shall answer it. What will you do? Now my necessity Makes me to ask you for my purse: It grieves me Much more, for what I cannot do for you, Than what befalls myself. You stand amaz'd; But be of comfort. 2 Off. Come, sir, away. Ant. I must entreat of you some of that money Vio. What money, sir? For the fair kindness you have show'd me here, And, part, being prompted by your present trouble, Out of my lean and low ability I'll lend you something: my having is not much; I'll make division of my present with you: Hold, there is half my coffer. Ant. Will you deny me now? Is't possible, that my deserts to you Vio. I know of none; Nor know I you by voice, or any feature: O heavens themselves! I snatch'd one half out of the jaws of death; 1Off: What's that to us? The time goes by; away. [Exeunt Officers with Antonio. Vio. Methinks, his words do from such passion fly, That he believes himself; so do not I. Prove true, imagination, O, prove true, That I, dear brother, be now ta'en for you! Sir To. Come hither, knight; come hither, Fabian; we'll whisper o'er a couple or two of most sage saws. Vio. He nam'd Sebastian; I my brother know Yet living in my glass; even such, and so, In favour was my brother; and he went Still in this fashion, colour, ornament, For him I imitate: O, if it prove, Tempests are kind, and salt waves fresh in love! ACT IV. SCENE I The Street before Olivia's House. Clo. Will you make me believe, that I am not Clo, Well held out, i'faith! No, I do not know you; nor I am not sent to you by my lady, to bid you come speak with her; nor your name is not master Cesario; nor this is not my nose neither. Nothing, that is so, is so. Seb. 1 pr'ythee, vent thy folly somewhere else: Thou know'st not me. Clo. Vent my folly! he has heard that word of some great man, and now applies it to a fool. Vent my folly! I am afraid this great eat lubber, the world, will prove a cockney. I pr'ythee now, ungird thy strangeness, and tell me what I shall vent to my lady; Shall I vent to her, that thou art coming? Seb. I pr'ythee, foolish Greek, depart from me; There's money for thee; if you tarry longer, I shall give worse payment. Clo. By my troth, thou hast an open hand:These wise men, that give fools money, get themselves a good report after fourteen years' purchase. [Exeunt Sir Toby, Sir Andrew, and Fabian. 44 Let thy fair wisdom, not thy passion, sway He started one poor heart of mine in thee. Seb. What relish is in this? how runs the stream? Or I am mad, or else this is a dream:- Mar. Nay, I pr'ythee, put on this gown, and this beard; make him believe thou art sir Topas the curate; do it quickly I'll call sir Toby the whilst! [Brit Maria. Clo. Well, I'll put it on, and I will dissemble myself in't; and I would I were the first that ever dissembled in such a gown. I am not fat enough to become the function well: nor lean enough to be thought a good student. but to be said, an honest man, and a good housekeeper, goes as fairly, as to say, a careful man, and a great scholar. The com petitors enter. Enter Sir Toby Belch and Maria, Sir To. Jove bless thee, master parson. Sir To. To him, sir Topas. knave. Mal. [in an inner chamber.] Who calls there? Clo. Sir Topas, the curate, who comes to visit Malvolio the lunatick. Mal. Sir Topas, sir Topas, good sir Topas, go to my lady. Clo. Out, hyperbolical fiend! how vexest thou this man? talkest thou nothing but of ladies? Sir To. Well said, master parson. Mal. Sir Topas, never was man thus wronged: good sir Topas, do not think I am mad; they have laid me here in hideous darkness. Clo. Fye, thou dishonest Sathan! I call thee by the most modest terms; for I am one of those gentle ones, that will use the devil himself with courtesy: Say'st thou, that house is dark? Mal. As hell, sir Topas. Clo. Why, it hath bay-windows, transparent as barricadoes, and the clear stories towards the southnorth are as lustrous as ebony; and yet complainest thou of obstruction? Mal. I am not mad, sir Topas; I say to you, this house is dark. Clo. Madman, thou errest: I say, there is no darkness, but ignorance; in which thou art more puzzled, than the Egyptians in their fog. Mal. I say, this house is as dark as ignorance, though ignorance were as dark as hell; and I say, there was never man thus abused: I am no more mad than you are; make the trial of it in any constant question. Clo. What is the opinion of Pythagoras, concerning wild-fowl? Mal. That the soul of our grandam might haply inhabit a bird. Clo. What thinkest thou of his opinion? Mal. I think nobly of the soul, and no way approve his opinion. Clo. Fare thee well: Remain thou still in darkness thou shalt hold the opinion of Pythagoras, ere I will allow of thy wits; and fear to kill a woodcock, lest thou dispossess the soul of thy grandam. Fare thee well. Mal. Sir Topas, sir Topas,- A Mar. Thou might'st have done this without thy beard, and gown; he sees thee not. Sir To. To him in thine own voice, and bring me word how thou findest him: I would, we were delivered, I would he were; for I am now so far in Oli. Nay, come, I pr'ythee: 'Would thou'dst be well rid of this knavery. If he may be conveniently rul'd by me? Clo Alas, why is she so? Mal. Fool, I say ; Clo. She loves another-Who calls, ha ? Mal, Good fool, as ever thou wilt deserve well at my hand, help me to a candle, and pen, ink, and paper; as I am a gentleman, I will live to be thankful to thee for't. Clo. Master Malvolio!' Mal. Ay, good fool. Clo. Alas, sir, how fell you besides your five wits? Mal. Fool, there was never man so notoriously abused: I am as well in my wits, fool, as thou art. Clo. But as well? then you are mad, indeed, if you be no better in your wits than a fool, Mal, They have here propertied me; keep me in darkness, send ministers to me, asses, and do all they can to face me out of my wits. Clo. Advise you what you say; the minister is here. Malvolio, Malvolio, thy wits the heavens restore! endeavour thyself to sleep, and leave thy vain bibble babble. Mal. Sir Topas, Clo. Maintain no words with him, good fellow.Who, I, sir? not I, sir. God b'wi'you, good sir Topas. Marry, amen. I will, sir, I will. Mal. Fool, fool, fool, I say, nt. What say you, sir? I Clo. Alas, sir, be patient. am shent for speaking to you. Mal. Good fool, help me to some light, and some paper; I tell thee, I am as well in my wits as any man in Illyria. Clo. Well-a-day, that you were, sir? Mal. By this hand, I am: Good fool, some ink, paper, and light, and convey what I will set down to my lady; it shall advantage thee more than ever the bearing of letter did. Clo. I will help you to't. But tell me true, are you not mad indeed? or do you but counterfeit? Mal. Believe me, I am not; I tell thee true. and ink. Clo. Nay, 1'll ne'er believe a madman, till I see his brains. I will fetch you light, and paper, Mal. Fool, I'll requite it in the highest degree: I pr'ythee, be gone. Seb. This is the air; that is the glorious sun; This pearl she gave me, I do feel't, and see't: And though 'tis wonder that enwraps me thus, Yet 'tis not madness, Where's Antonio then? I could not find him at the Elephant: Yet there he was; and there I found this credit, She could not sway her house, command her Take, and give back, affairs, and their despatch, With such a smooth, discreet, and stable bearing, As, I perceive, she does: there's something in't, That is deceivable. But here comes the lady. Enter Olivia and a Priest. Oli. Blame not this haste of mine: If you mean well, Now go with me, and with this holy man, Seb. I'll follow this good man, and go with you; And, having sworn truth, ever will be true. Oli. Then lead the way, good father; heavens so shine, That they may fairly note this act of mine! ACT V. And [Excunt. SCENE I. The Street before Olivia's House Fab. Now, as thou lovest me, let me see his letter. Clo. Good master Fabian, grant me another request. Fab. Any thing. Clo. Do not desire to see this letter, Fab. That is, to give a dog, and, in recompense, desire my dog again. Enter Duke, Viola, and Attendants. Duke. Belong you to the lady Olivia, friends. Clo. Ay, sir; we are some of her trappings. Duke. I know thee well; How dost thou, my good fellow? Clo. Truly, sir, the better for my foes, and the worse for my friends. Duke. Just the contrary; the better for thy friends. Clo. No, sir, the worse. Duke. How can that be? Clo. Marry, sir, they praise me, and make an ass of me; now my foes tell me plainly I am an ass: so that by my foes, sir, I profit in the knowledge of myself; and by my friends I am abused so that, conclusions to be as kisses, if your four negatives make your two affirmatives, why, then the worse for my friends, and the better for my foes. Duke. Why, this is excellent. Clo. By my troth, sir, no; though it please you to be one of my friends. Duke. Thou shalt not be the worse for me; there's gold. Clo. But that it would be double-dealing, sir, I would you could make it another. Duke. O, you give me ill counsel. Clo. Put your grace in your pocket, sir, for this once, and let your flesh and blood obey it. Duke. Well, I will be so much a sinner to be a double dealer; there's another. Clo. Primo, secundo, tertio, is a good play; and the old saying is, the third pays for all the triplex, sir, is a good tripping meas measure; or the bells of St. Bennet, sir, may put you in mind; One, two, three. Duke. You can fool no more money out of me at this throw if you will let your lady know, I am here to speak with her, and bring her along with you, it may awake my bounty further. Clo. Marry, sir, lullaby to your bounty, till I come again. I go, sir; but I would not have you to think, that my desire of having, is the sin of covetousness: but, as you say, sir, let your bounty take a nap, I will awake it anon. [Exit Clown. Enter Antonio and Officers. Oli. Even what it please my lord, that shall be- Duke. Why should I not, had I the heart to do it, Vio. Here comes the man, sir, that did rescue me. Live you, the marble-breasted tyrant, still; Yet, when I saw it last, it was besmear'd For shallow draught, and bulk, unprizable: That very envy, and the tongue of loss, But this your minion, whom, I know, you love, Where he sits crowned in his master's spite.- chief: I'll sacrifice the lamb that I do love, [ter? [dy; Oli. Where goes Cesario ? Cry'd fame and honour on him. What's the mat- Vio. He did me kindness, sir; drew on my side; Duke. Notable pirate! thou salt-water thief! Ant. [me; Orsino, noble sir, Vio. [Following. After him I love, More than I love these eyes, more than my life, Oli. Ah me, detested! how am I beguil'd! Vio. Who does beguile you? who does do you wrong? Oli. Hast thou forgot thyself? Is it so long?- No, my lord, not I. Oli. Alas, it is the baseness of thy fear, Re-enter Attendant and Priest. Father, I charge thee, by thy reverence, Priest. A contract of eternal bond of love, Strengthen'd by interchangement of your rings; I have travelled but two hours. [grave, Duke. O, thou dissembling cub! what wilt thou O, do not swear; Hold little faith, though thou hast too much fear. Sir And. For the love of God, a surgeon; send one presently to sir Toby. Oti. What's the matter? Sir And. He has broke my head across, and has given sir Toby a bloody coxcomb too for the love of God, your help: I had rather than forty pound, I were at home. Oli. Who has done this, sir Andrew? Sir And. The count's gentleman, one Cesario: we took him for a coward, but he's the very devil incardinate. Duke. My gentleman, Cesario? Sir And. Od's lifelings, here he is :-You broke |