[all! Escal. Well, heaven forgive him! and forgive us Some rise by sin, and some by virtue fall: Some run from brakes of vice, and answer none; And some condemned for a fault alone. Enter Elbow, Froth, Clown, Officers, &c. Elb. Come, bring them away if these be good people in a common-weal, that do nothing but use their abuses in common houses, I know no law; bring them away. Ang. How now, sir! What's your name? and what's the matter? Elb. If it please your honour, I am the poor duke's constable, and my name is Elbow; 1 do lean upon justice, sir, and do bring in here before your good honour two notorious benefactors. Ang. Benefactors? Well; what benefactors are they? are they not malefactors? Elb. If it please your honour, I know not well what they are: but precise villains they are, that I am sure of; and void of all profanation in the world, that good christians ought to have. Escal. This comes off well; here's a wise officer. Ang. Go to: What quality are they of? Elbow is your name? Why dost thou not speak, Elbow? Clo. He cannot, sir; he's out at elbow. Ang. What are you, sir? Elb. He, sir? a tapster, sir; parcel-bawd; one that serves a bad woman; whose house, sir, was, as they say, pluck'd down in the suburbs; and now she professes a hot-house, which, I think, is a very ill house too. Escal. How know you that? Elb. My wife, sir, whom I detest before heaven and your honour, Escal. How! thy wife? Clo. Very well: you being then, if you be remem ber'd, cracking the stones of the aforesaid prunes. Froth. Ay, so I did, indeed. Clo. Why, very well: 1 telling you then, if you be remember'd, that such a one, and such a one, were past cure of the thing you wot of, unless they kept very good diet, as I told you. Froth. All this is true. Clo. Why, very well then. Escal. Come, you are a tedious fool to the purpose. What was done to Elbow's wife, that he hath cause to complain of? Come me to what was done to her. Clo. Sir, your honour cannot come to that yet. Escal. No, sir, nor I mean it not. Clo. Sir, but you shall come to it, by your honour's leave: And, I beseech you, look into master Froth here, sir; a man of fourscore pound a year; whose father died at Hallowmas-Was't not at Hallowmas, master Froth ? Froth. All-hollond eve. Clo. Why, very well; I hope here be truths: He, sir, sitting, as I say, in a lower chair, sir;-'twas in the Bunch of Grapes, where, indeed, you have a delight to sit Have you not? Froth. I have so; because it is an open room, and good for winter. Clo. Why, very well then;-I hope here be truths. Ang. This will last out a night in Russia, When nights are longest there: I'll take my leave, And leave you to the hearing of the cause; Hoping, you'll find good cause to whip them all. Escal. I think no less Good morrow to your lordship. [Exit Angelo. Now, sir, come on What was done to Elbow's wife, once more? Clo. Once, sir? there was nothing done to her once. Elb. I beseech you, sir, ask him what this man did to my wife. Clo. I beseech your honour, ask me. Escal. Well, sir: what did this gentleman to her? Clo. I beseech you, sir, look in this gentleman's face. Good master Froth, look upon his honour 'tis for a good purpose: Doth your honour mark Elb. Ay, sir; whom, I thank heaven, is an his face? honest woman, Escal. Dost thou detest her therefore? Elb. I say, sir, I will detest myself also, as well as she, that this house, if it be not a bawd's house, it is pity of her life, for it is a naughty house. Escal. Ay, sir, very well. Clo. Nay, I beseech you, mark it well. Escal. We I do so. Clo. Doth your honour see any harm in his face ? Escal. Why, no. Clo. I'll be supposed upon a book, his face is the worst thing about him: Good then; if his face be the worst thing about him, how could master Froth Escal. How dost thou know that, constable? Elb. Marry, sir, by my wife; who, if she had been a woman cardinally given, might have been accused in fornication, adultery, and all uncleanli- do the constable's wife any harm? I would know ness there. Escal. By the woman's means? Elb. Ay, sir, by mistress Over-done's means: but as she spit in his face, so she defied him. Clo. Sir, if it please your honour, this is not so. Elb. Prove it before these varlets here, thou honourable man, prove it. Escal. Do you hear how he misplaces? [To Angelo. Clo. Sir, she came in great with child; and longing (saving your honour's reverence) for stew'd prunes; sir, we had but two in the house, which at that very distant time stood, as it were, in a fruitdish, a dish of some three-pence; your honours have seen such dishes; they are not China dishes, but very good dishes." Escal. Go to, go to; no matter for the dish, sir. Clo. No, indeed, sir, not of a pin; you are therein in the right: but, to the point: As I say, this mistress Elbow, being, as I say, with child, and that of your honour. Escal. He's in the right: Constable, what say you to it? Elb. First, an it like you, the house is a respected. house; next, this is a respected fellow; and his mistress is a respected woman. Clo. By this hand, sir, his wife is a more respected person than any of us all. Elb. Varlet, thou liest; thou liest, wicked varlet: the time is yet to come, that she was ever respected, with man, woman, or child. Clo. Sir, she was respected with him before he married with her. Escal. Which is the wiser here? Justice, or Ini quity PIs this true? Elb. O thou caitiff! O thou varlet! thou wicked Hannibal 1 I respected with her, before I was married to her? If ever I was respected with her, or she with me, let not your worship think me the poor duke's officer: Prove this, thou wicked Hannibal, or I'll have mine action of battery on thee. Escal. If he took you a box o' th' ear, you might have your action of slander too. Elb. Marry, I thank your good worship for it What is't your worship's pleasure I should do with this wicked caitiff? Escal. Truly, officer, because he hath some offences in him, that thou wouldst discover if thou couldst, let him continue in his courses, till thou know'st what they are. hither, master Constable. How long have you been in this place of constable ?" Elb. Seven year and a half, sir. Escal. I thought, by your readiness in the office, you had continued in it some time: You say, seven years together? Elb. And a half, sir. Escal. Alas! it hath been great pains pa to you! They do you wrong to put you so oft upon't: Are there not men in your ward sufficient to serve it? Elb. Faith, sir, few of any wit in such matters: Elb. Marry, I thank your worship for it as they are chosen, they are glad to choose me for Thou seest, thou wicked varlet now, what's come Escal. Where were you born, friend? [To Froth. Escal. Are you of fourscore pounds a year? Escal. So. What trade are you of, sir? [To the Clown. Clo. A tapster; a poor widow's tapster. Clo. Mistress Over-done. Escal. Hath she had any more than one husband? Escal. Nine! Come hither to me, master Froth. Master Froth, I would not have you acquainted with tapsters: they will draw you, master Froth, and you will hang them: Get you gone, and let me hear no more of you. Froth. I thank your worship: For mine own part, I never come into any room in a taphouse, but I am drawn in. Escal. Well; no more of it master Froth: farewell. [Exit Froth.]-Come you hither to me, master tapster; what's your name, master tapster? Clo. Pompey. Escal. What else? Clo. Bum, sir. Escal. "Troth, and your bum is the greatest thing about you; so that, in the beastliest sense, you are Pompey the great. Pompey, you are partly a bawd, Pompey, howsoever you colour it in being a tapster. Are you not? come, tell me true; it shall be the better for you. Clo. Truly, sir, I am a poor fellow, that would live. Escal. How would you live, Pompey? by being a bawd? What do you think of the trade, Pompey? is it a lawful trade? Clo. If the law would allow it, sir. Escal. But the law will not allow it, Pompey: nor it shall not be allowed in Vienna. Clo. Does your worship mean to geld and spay all the youth in the city? Escal. No, Pompey. Clo. Truly, sir, in my poor opinion, they will to't then: If your worship will take order for the drabs and the knaves, you need not to fear the bawds. Escal. There are pretty orders beginning, I can tell you: It is but heading and hanging. out a Clo. If you head and hang all that offend that way but for ten year together, you'll be glad to give commission for more heads. If this law hold in Vienna ten year, I'll rent the fairest house in it, after three-pence a bay: If you live to see this come to pass, say, Pompey told you so. Escal. Thank you, good Pompey and, in requital of your prophecy, hark you, I advise you, let me not find you before me again upon any complaint whatsoever, no, not for dwelling where you do; if I do, Pompey, I shall beat you to your tent, and prove a shrewd Cæsar to you; in plain dealing, Pompey, I shall have you whipt: so for this time, Pompey, fare you well. Clo. I thank your worship for your good counsel; Dut I shall follow it, as the flesh and fortune shall better determine. Whip me? No, no; let carman whip his jade; them; I do it for some piece of money, and go through with all. Escal. Look you, bring me in the names of some six or seven, the most sufficient of your parish. Elb. To your worship's house, sir? Escal. To my house: Fare you well. [Exit Elbow.] What's o'clock, think you ? Just. Eleven, sir. Escal. I pray you home to dinner with me. Escal. It grieves me for the death of Claudio: But there's no remedy. Just. Lord Angelo is severe. Escal. It is but needful: Mercy is not itself, that oft looks so; [Excunt. Serv. Here is the sister of the man condemn'd, Desires access to you. Ang. Hath he a sister? Prov. Ay, my good lord; a very virtuous maid, Well, let her be admitted. [Exit Servant. See you, the fornicatress be remov'd; Enter Lucio and Isabella. Prov. Save your honour! [Offering to retire. Ang. Stay a little while.- [To Isab.] You are welcome: What's your will? Isab. I am a woeful suitor to your honour, Please but your honour hear me. Well; what's your suit? Ang. Isab. There is a vice, that most I do abhor, Escal. Come hither to me, master Elbow; come And most desire should meet the blow of justice; Kneel down before him, hang upon his gown; You are too cold if you should need a pin, As Jove himself does, Jove would ne'er be quiet, Split'st the unwedgeable and gnarled oak, You could not with more tame a tongue desire it: Thou rather, with thy sharp and sulphurous bolt, To him, I say. Isab. Must he needs die ? Ang. He's sentenc'd; 'tis too late. Not the king's crown, nor the deputed sword, And you as he, you would have slipt like him; Ang. Pray you, begone. Isab. I would to heaven I had your potency, And you were Isabel? should it then be thus? No; I would tell what 'twere to be a judge, And what a prisoner. Lucio. Ay, touch him there's the vein. [Aside. Ang. Your brother is a forfeit of the law, And you but waste your words. Isab. Alas! alas! Than the soft myrtle ;-0, but man, proud man! Most ignorant of what he's most assur'd, Lucio. O, to him, to him, wench: he will relent; Pray heaven, she win him! Isab. We cannot weigh our brother with ourself: Great men may jest with saints: 'tis wit in them; But, in the less, foul profanation. Lucio. Thou'rt in the right, girl; more o'that. Isab. That in the captain's but a cholerick word, Which in the soldier is flat blasphemy. Ang. Why do you put these sayings upon me? Hath yet a kind of medicine in itself, That skins the vice o' the top: Go to your bosom; Knock there; and ask your heart, what it doth know What dost thou? or what art thou, Angelo? ( To several subjects: heaven hath my empty words: in Dost thou desire her foully, for those things That make her good? O, let her brother live: Thieves for their robbery have authority, When judges steal themselves. What? do I love That I desire to hear her speak again, As if I did but only chew his name; With saints dost bait thy hook! Most dangerous Is that temptation, that doth goad us on To sin in loving virtue: never could the strumpet, With all her double vigour, art, and nature, To thy false seeming? Blood, thou still art blood: Once stir my temper; but this virtuous maid Subdues me quite; - Ever till now, Let's write good angel on the devil's horn, how. [Exit. Enter Servant. How now, who's there? Serv. SCENE III.-A Room in a Prison. Enter Duke, habited like a Friar, and Provost. Duke. Hail to you, provost! so, I think you are. Prov. I am the provost: What's your will, good friar? Duke. Bound by my charity, and my bless'd order, I come to visit the afflicted spirits Here in the prison: do me the common right To let me see them; and to make me know The nature of their crimes, that I may minister To them accordingly. Prov. I would do more than that if more were Duke. Then was your sin of heavier kind than Juliet. I do confess it, and repent it, father. [his. Duke. 'Tis meet so, daughter: but lest you do repent, As that the sin hath brought you to this shame,Which sorrow is always toward ourselves, not heaven; Showing, we'd not spare heaven, as we love it, Juliet. I do repent me, as it is an evil; And take the shame with joy. Desires access to you. Ang. O heavens! One Isabel, a sister, Teach her the way. [Exit Serv. Why does my blood thus muster to my heart: And dispossessing all the other parts Of necessary fitness ? So play the foolish throngs with one that swoons; That his soul sicken not. Ang. Ha! Fye, these filthy vices! It were as good To pardon him, that hath from nature stolen Their sawcy sweetness, that do coin heaven's image, Isab. "Tis set down so in heaven, but not in earth. Sir, believe this, I had rather give my body than my soul. Isab. How say you? Ang. Nay, I'll not warrant that; for I can speak Against the thing I I sa say. Answer to this;I, now the voice of the recorded law, Pronounce a sentence on your brother's life: Isab. True. Ang. Admit no other way to save his life, Could fetch your brother from the manacles What would you do? Isab. As much for my poor brother, as myself: That is, Were I under the terms of death, The impression of keen whips I'd wear as rubies, And strip myself to death, as to a bed That longing I have been sick for, ere I'd yield My body up to shame. Ang. Then must your brother die. Isab. And 'twere the cheaper way: Better it were, a brother died at once, Than that a sister, by redeeming him, Should die for ever. Ang. Were not you then as cruel as the sentence That you have slander'd so? Isab. Ignominy in ransom, and free pardon, Are of two houses: lawful mercy is Ang. You seem'd of late to make the law a tyrant; Isab. O, pardon me, my lord; it oft falls out, To have what we'd have, we speak not what we :mean: I something do excuse the thing I hate, For his advantage that I dearly love. Ang. We are all frail. Isab. Else let my brother die, If not a feodary, but only he, Owe, and succeed by weakness. Ang. Nay, women are frail too. Isab. Ay, as the glasses where they view them selves; Which are as easy broke as they make forms. Women!-Help heaven! men their creation mar In profiting by them. Nay, call us ten times frail; For we are soft as our complexions are, And credulous to false prints. Ang. I think it well: And from this testimony of your own sex, (Since, I suppose, we are made to be no stronger Than faults may shake our franies,) let me be bold; I do arrest your words; Be that you are, I will proclaim thee, Angelo; look for't: Ang. Who will believe thee, Isabel? My unsoil'd name, the austereness of my life, Will so your accusation overweigh, That you shall stifle in your own report, Fit thy consent to my sharp appetite; By yielding up thy body to my will; Or else he must not only die the death, 1 Exit. Isab. To whom shall I complain? Did I tell this, Who would believe me? O perilous mouths, That bears in them one and the self-same tongue, Either of condemnation or approof! Bidding the law make court'sy to their will; Hooking both right and wrong to the appetite, To follow as it draws! I'll to my brother: Though he hath fallen by prompture of the blood, Yet hath he in him such a mind of honour, That had he twenty heads to tender down On twenty bloody blocks, he'd yield them up, Before his sister should her body stoop To such abhorr'd pollution. Then Isabel, live chaste, and, brother, die: More than our brother is our chastity. I'll tell him yet of Angelo's request, And fit his mind to death, for his soul's rest That is, a woman; if you be more, you're none; If you be one, (as you are well express'd Are nurs'd by baseness Thou art by no means valiant; For thou dost fear the soft and tender fork |