THE GRIDIRON;

OR, PADDY MULLOWNEY'S TRAVELS IN FRANCE

A CERTAIN old gentleman in the west of Ireland, whose love of the ridiculous quite equalled his taste for claret and fox-hunting, was wont upon certain festive occasions, when opportunity offered, to amuse his friends by drawing out one of his servants who was exceedingly fond of what he termed his "thravels," and in whom a good deal of whim, some queer stories, and perhaps, more than all, long and faithful services, had established a right of loquacity. He was one of those few trusty and privileged domestics, who, if his

master unheedingly uttered a rash thing in a fit of passion, would venture to set him right. If the squire said, “I'll turn that rascal off," my friend Pat would say, "Throth you won't, Sir;" and Pat was always right, for if any altercation arose upon the "subject matter in hand," he was sure to throw in some good reason, either from former service-general good conduct-or the delinquent's "wife and childher," that always turned the scale.

But I am digressing. On such merry meetings as I have alluded to, the master, (after making certain "approaches" as a military man would say, as the preparatory steps in laying siege to some extravaganza of his servant,) might, perchance, assail Pat thus: " "By the bye, Sir John (addressing a distinguished guest), Pat has a very curious story, which something you told me to-day reminds me of. You remember, Pat (turning to the man, evidently pleased at the notice thus paid

to himself)-you remember that queer

you had in France ?"

"Throth I do, Sir," grins forth Pat.

adventure

"What!" exclaims Sir John, in feigned sur

prise, was Pat ever in France ?"

"Indeed he was," cries mine host; and Pat adds, "Ay, and farther, plase your honour."

"I assure you, Sir John," continues my host, "Pat told me a story once that surprised me very much, respecting the ignorance of the French."

"Indeed," rejoins the baronet; "really I always supposed the French to be a most accomplished people."

"Throth then, they're not, Sir," interrupts

Pat.

"Oh, by no means," adds mine host, shaking his head emphatically.

"I believe, Pat, 'twas when you were crossing the Atlantic?" says the master, turning to Pat with a seductive air, and leading into the "full